Allergies

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My ex-cop and I hung out without having sex for the first time.  It was fun, but not as much fun as having sex, obviously. His son is a pro-hockey player, so we watched one of his matches.  Not sure where he got the idea of inviting me, but I enjoyed myself.  I especially enjoyed sitting down for nearly two hours. Been sorting and packing for days and I’m exhausted.

Oddly, I had an allergic reaction afterwards.  I woke up with something that looked like insect bites all over me, around the top of my legs, behind my arms, etc.  Odd places and not everywhere, happily not my face or I would have looked like Quasimodo.

It was probably  something I ate, but I teased him that maybe I’m allergic to hanging out with him and not having sex. Or maybe it’s my husband…. who knows.

He’s helping me move Saturday.  I left him many opportunities of not needing to, but he’s in. Not sure about that, either. Why is the guy who says, three times now, “Don’t fall in love with me” start acting like a boyfriend instead of a lover? I was pretty happy not to have a boyfriend.

And then there’s Mr. Wonderful, who is just a really, really good guy.  So good that I don’t know if we’ll ever get further than climbing together. I don’t know if he wants more, but since I’m still involved with my ex-cop, the longer getting intimate is put off, the longer I have to put off making a choice. If a choice will ever need to be made.

There’s one more in the pot, but I have to be really careful with him.  Another incredibly nice man that I met off a dating site.  I need to not play with him.  He could probably fall in love with “me” (one that he’s invented in his head since we don’t know each other that well) and I could hurt him.  He could be someone vulnerable.

We met once for a drink and he was timid and lovely. Then we went for a hike, and I stopped by his place and we kissed.  It was pretty hot, actually.  He could be wonderful in bed. But I should not play with him.

I wonder why I had an allergic reaction, and to what. Too many men and not enough love, maybe.

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