It’s odd how many physical things have changed since I’ve started having sex again. My skin is clearer, and there’s just no other way to say this, but I’m never constipated anymore. My vaginal flora is completely different, a fact which made me run to the doctor in fear of STDs. The doctor was nice, though, did some tests (which came up negative later), and told me that he thought it was just starting up sex again. He said as well that I might have heavier periods, and that it might push back the start of menopause. Apparently if you don’t use it, you lose it.
I wonder if there has been medical research regarding an active sex life and things like mineral absorption, or endorphin production.
I don’t sleep solidly anymore. This might be because I’m having problems with my husband, or it might be the fact that lying to go see my lovers makes me incredibly uncomfortable. I don’t know if I want to leave my husband, but I know that I don’t want to lie to him. Or it might be with whom I’m having sex.
With E, when we have sex, I don’t sleep well afterwards. I’m still trembling. With P, it’s like a sleeping pill.
Which is why, since I have an excuse to spend the night out next weekend (at my cousins), I’ve asked P if he’s free. I want to sleep in his arms, sure. But I also just want to sleep.