The decision to stay or leave a relationship is never, ever easy. There are things that can help. Like if you just want out and your partner cheats on you, it’s easy. You’ve been given the excuse. Or if they do something else that’s unpardonable, hitting you, or hitting the kids. You can just pack up, leave and have no regrets. You might miss them, you might be scared, but it’s easy to know what the right thing to do is. You might not always want to do it, but you know.
There are other things that go into the almost unpardonable. Like buying something outrageously expensive when you can’t afford it.
My husband has been stressed out about money for a couple of years. His parents, like nearly everyone’s parents, cost a lot at the end. They, like a lot of people’s parents, didn’t really plan for inflation and how much might be needed. So while they all have more than enough — an apartment and another building, both of which if sold would cover the end of all their lives — my husband is stressed about money. So much so that I’ve changed plans of things I wanted to do in order to work a bit more, put a bit more aside, not go on a long trip that I dreamed of doing. (I would have had to do it alone, since he doesn’t like traveling that much).
And he buys a sports car. It would have possibly been okay if we’d talked about it, but we didn’t. In addition, I was apparently then required to trade in the car I’d recuperated from his father. I’d paid his dad 2,500 for it, and the trade in value was 1,500. So if I wanted more than that, I was supposedly going to have to find a buyer myself.
It wasn’t enough to leave him. It was minor. But there’s that, plus the other thing, plus more things….
Is it surprising that I find myself wanting to leave…..